Xperia-nce the best!

“…why the developer thought it would be a good idea for me to stick my shiny new phone between my wife's legs is beyond me...”

The first thing you notice about Sony Ericsson's Xperia X10, right after its sleek and sexy glossy body, bright screen, 8 megapixel camera and beautiful Timescape interface, is how much it uses the battery.

So let's get the bad news out of the way first: Sony Ericsson boast that this phone can achieve up to 425 hours from the battery in standby mode.  This is, quite frankly, a blatant lie.

I timed mine, switching it on in the morning from a full charge and leaving it alone all day.  After thirteen hours and three minutes, the battery was dead.

Both Sony Ericsson and Vodafone, my mobile provider, told me that I could extend the battery life by switching off such features as GPS and Wi-Fi, but as the GPS was already off and my phone wasn't in range of a wireless network, such advice seemed redundant.  Not to mention that if I didn't want to have such facilities as GPS and Wi-Fi, I wouldn't have bothered buying the phone in the first place.

Switching them off, then, seems kind of pointless.

Still, the iPhone fares no better when it comes to battery life, and as the X10 is aiming squarely at the same market place we can assume there are no victors on either side in the battery argument.

So what is the Sony Ericsson Xperia X10?  In short, it's Sony Ericsson's first foray in to the Android market place.  Android being Google's smartphone operating system to challenge the iPhone, and it does this very well indeed.

Certainly, Apple's 'Jesus Phone' has got a big chunk of this particular market place at the moment, but Google's clever move has been to release Android as an operating platform to any manufacturer or developer who wants to play with it, and let them put it on to any device they wish.  Apple, on the other hand, keep their OS strictly to themselves and rigorously check every app written for the device before releasing it to their market.

As a result there are many more manufacturers putting Android on to their top-of-the-line mobile phones and, in the US, Android phones have started to outsell the iPhone this year.

The other big advantage of Android is that it can run more than one application simultaneously, whereas the current crop of iPhones can't.  This means you can have instant messaging and e-mail applications open whilst listening to your favourite music and browsing the web.

Like Apple's phone, there is a Market place where applications - or 'apps' - can be downloaded, and apps for just about everything you'd ever desire can be put on your phone.  The Android market is still not as populated as Apple's, but it's growing by the day and a plethora of free and pay-for apps ranging from games to office applications and everything mundane in between can generally be found.  There's even one that turns my new Sony Ericsson in to a vibrator, though why the developer thought it would be a good idea for me to stick my shiny new phone between my wife's legs is beyond me...

The other advantage of Android is that each developer can 'skin' their own interface, essentially making the phone look bespoke to their brand, whilst still taking advantage of Google's slick mobile operating system.

Sony Ericsson have done this extremely well, focusing heavily on the social networking market space and squarely marketing this phone at Twitter and Facebook addicts.  Their Timescape interface brings feeds from your social networking accounts in to one simple, scrolling page that allows you to see all updates from your contacts with the flick of a finger on the screen.  If one grabs your attention, simply touch that particular image and it will bring up the relevant account with all details.

Timescape also allows you to link all your social networking feeds with your contacts list.  This takes a little time to do, but it's worth doing.  Each time you scroll through your contacts you'll see their latest Facebook or Twitter updates without having to open your browser.

Mediascape is Sony Ericsson's music player, photo and video library all rolled in to one.  It makes selecting your music, pictures and videos easy and allows you to display slideshows to your friends of your latest holiday snaps.  It even connects to Facebook and Picasa and allows you to show off photographs you've got stored online, too.

The 8 megapixel camera is good, with a variety of digital camera options including face recognition, smile detection and image stabiliser all helping provide good quality images - excellent for a phone but even with eight megapixels the images still lack some depth.  The 16x digital zoom is poor, with even the mildest zoom applied leaving the images pixelated, and the unprotected lens on the back of the camera is easy to smudge with your finger when taking the phone from your pocket.

The phone comes with a photolight but, as this device is being shipped with version 1.6 of Android, it doesn't act as a flash.  Sony and Vodafone have both advised me that when they release the upgrade to version 2.0+ of Android this flaw will be rectified.  I wait with baited breath...

Being a Google device it communicates with all of Google's online services seamlessly so if, like me, you're already a Googlephile, setting the phone up is a doddle.  I simply switched it on for the first time, gave it my Gmail login details, and within two minutes my contact list was populated with all my e-mail addresses and telephone numbers stored online.

This phone does rely heavily on being connected to the Internet and so you must make sure you've got an unlimited data contract with your mobile provider.  Failure to do so will result in some spectacularly expensive bills!  Its insistence on constantly updating you with e-mail and social media feeds will also remind you of how much junk your life receives throughout the day.  After a couple of days use it left me wishing for the 1980s, my collection of LP records and having to knock on the door of my mates' houses in order to find out what they were up to.

As I approach my forties, however, I do find myself having a particular aversion to touchscreen keyboards.  I like to feel something click under my finger tips and the X10's onscreen keyboard has been a constant thorn in my side as I fumble my way from one letter to another.  The predictive text input onscreen, however, is excellent and often spots my errors and suggests corrections.  After two months of use I have started to get used to it and can now type a text or e-mail with relative ease, although if I'm not concentrating I can end up writing utter rubbish.

One huge plus that I do love on the X10, however, is Google Maps.  Coupled with Google's recently launched Navigation service, the device now acts as a full Satellite Navigation solution in the car, with better results than even the industry-leading Tom Tom has managed to achieve.

Despite some of the flaws, however, I love the X10 overall.  The interface is shiny, bright and easy to read and it means that when I'm out-and-about I'm in constant contact with my friends and my business without having to lug my heavy Compaq laptop about, whilst simultaneously providing me with entertainment and a good camera for those opportune family-snap moments.

If you can get used to the constant raping of the battery - I recommend buying several USB-based charging leads to dot about the home and office - and can forgive some of the weaknesses the camera shouldn't have, this makes an excellent everyday phone and a clear alternative to the Apple iPhone.

If you’re going to crash…

“Had my hair cut, gone grey, crashed in to an ambulance, been breathalysed, ensured that an ambulance driver has been suspended from his job, and left myself without a car in the process…”

When you wake up in the morning you always make decisions that affect how the rest of your day pans out.

Take me, for example.  This morning, I woke up and decided I needed a hair cut.  As I’m in training for the London to Cambridge Cycle Ride, I considered cycling to Newmarket and back again but then decided that the barber can often take a long time so driving would be quicker.

On the way in to town I heard a funny noise from the back of the car and thought it might need checking out, but then promptly forgot about that as I watched the barber blow dry all the colour from my hair.  I swear I wasn’t that grey before I went in…

Getting back to the car, I decided that I would drive up to Sam’s to get a burger but, as I drove out of the Market Square car park, I heard that funny noise again so decided to drive to Ian Button’s in Fordham to get the noise checked out, and turned right instead.

On the way to Fordham I saw an ambulance behind me, blue lights flashing, so – at the next roundabout – I pulled across to the side so that he could come around me.  For some reason, I assumed the ambulance driver would be going straight on so, when I saw in the wing mirror that he’d cleared me, I pulled out and accelerated again.  Only the ambulance driver was turning left on the roundabout across the front of my car…

It’s amazing how many emergency vehicles turn up when you write your car off on the side of an ambulance…

Still, all the attending paramedics and police officers declared that I am a fit and healthy young man (their words, not mine) but this is how my day has gone so far:

Had my hair cut, gone grey, crashed in to an ambulance, been breathalysed, ensured that an ambulance driver has been suspended from his job, and left myself without a car in the process.

How many other people can say they’ve achieved so much in such a short space of time?

If I’d made the decision to get fit and cycle in to town, or get fat and go up to Sam for a burger, I’d still have a car.  But I didn’t.  And I don’t.

Click here to see more pictures

Going for a ride…

Once I've got all my cycling gear on I end up looking like a human Fab ice lolly. Only nobody's ever keen on licking me...

On the morning of Monday 26th July I shall most likely wake up in bed, still caked in sweat and my muscles quivering with fatigue.

This won't be a delayed reaction to England's obvious success in the forthcoming World Cup tournament, nor - unfortunately - will it be because I finally managed to spend a night of unbridled passion between the sheets with Jennifer Aniston.

Instead, I'll be trying to recover from taking part in the London to Cambridge cycle ride the day before.

What started approximately twelve months ago between my friend, Keith, and myself was a simple need to work off a bit of beer belly.  Back then, attempting to complete a circulatory four-mile route felt like it would kill us.  And took about an hour to achieve.

Gradually, we were able to build up both our pace and our stamina but, as winter approached, we needed an incentive to keep us cycling through the icy conditions.  Somewhat foolishly, we decided it would be a good idea to take part in a cycling event and so, on Sunday 25th July, Keith Lomas and I, along with friends from the pub, will be taking part in the 57 mile event.

Now, ordinarily I hate begging letters, but understandably we'll be raising money for good causes: my youngest son is affected by Asperger's Syndrome and this local charity, Asperger's East Anglia, works with families and individuals whose lives have been altered by this condition.  Keith's chosen cause is the Irregular Cornea Foundation, an organisation founded to help raise global awareness of irregular cornea conditions and Keith's company, UltraVision CLPL, works closely with them.  The organisers of the event are Breakthrough Breast Cancer, and therefore we'd like to help make a contribution to them too.

I'm not writing this to ask for donations, but should you feel you'd like to help us raise money for these good causes and support us in making sure all the hard work of staying on the bikes throughout last winter's freezing temperatures was worthwhile, even the smallest contribution will be gratefully received and so I've included a link to our Charity Giving page at the end of this blog.

It's also worth noting, for comedic purposes, that (unless some generous benefactor feels like donating me a brand new bike) I'm going to be taking part in this event on my aged Raleigh mountain bike that I think is older than my children's ages combined!  And I haven't changed a puncture since the age of fifteen.

I'm a little worried that the lack of punctures over the past twenty three years might catch up on me all in one go...

With just shy of two months to go until the day itself, and with the World Cup hopefully going to be keeping me busy in the pub in between, I suspect July 25th will be here before I know it but you'll be able to keep up with how we're getting on via my Twitter feed or on my publican blog.

To ensure my poor old bones don't end up in too much of a bad way and that I don't get saddle sore, my wife has very generously been out and bought me a pair of cycling shorts that, quite frankly, make me feel like I'm wearing a nappy, a pair of fingerless gloves to stop my hands chafing on the handlebars, and a helmet that, honestly, makes me look like a berk.

Add to that the hi-viz t-shirt that I need to wear to make sure the traffic can see me wobbling about on the road and I end up looking like a human Fab Ice Lolly.  Only nobody ever seems too keen on the idea of licking me after I've been for a ride...

We're hoping to complete the distance in under six hours and then get back to the pub for a few celebratory pints.  I suspect, however, that by the time I've collapsed on Cambridge's Midsummer Common all I'll be wanting is the kiss of life.

So, if anybody's got Jennifer's number, please tell her where I'll be....

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Please do help support us on our ride by visiting http://www.charitygiving.co.uk/markkeithandothers - details of the ride and the charities we are raising money for can be found there.

Who The Hell Is Gene Hunt?

Warning: contains spoilers of Ashes to Ashes and Lost…

So the two greatest questions in television history (well, almost) have finally been answered:

“Who the hell is Gene Hunt?” and “Will they get off that damned island?”  They rank, sort of, with that timeless classic: “Who shot J.R.?”

The answers are simple:

Gene Hunt, it turns out, is God and, after a brief tussle with Satan, decides it’s time to let Will, Chris, Shaz and his sort-of love interest Alex Drake saunter off this mortal coil by opening the door to a pub.

Essentially, they’ve all been in that between-worlds limbo and Gene Hunt was in their collective imagination.

Series 3 of Ashes has struggled to maintain my interest but, while I would have much preferred to see God/Gene Hunt have a quickie with Alex Drake and send her off to the pub with a smile on her face rather than tears rolling down her cheeks, Life On Mars and Ashes to Ashes have kept my attention reasonably well over the past five years.  Lost, on the other hand, waned early on for me.

After Series 2, which basically appeared to repeat everything that had happened in Series 1, I got bored and didn’t bother watching again, preferring instead to watch the final episode and see if I could catch up with the characters’ lives without too much difficulty.  I watch Coronation Street in a similar vain: not at all for years and then switch it on at Christmas time to see that Gail Platt (or whichever surname it is she goes by now) is still a snivelling, whining waste of time whose voice is akin to scratching a fork down a blackboard.

But such hype has been made over how the series would end, just what the island is, and what will happen to its inhabitants that broadcasters around the world came up with the idea of a ‘simulcast’, showing the final episode simultaneously to prevent spoilers, internet piracy and, apparently, sleep.

Because here in the UK, to keep up with America, the final episode was screened at 5am.  On a Monday morning.  Meaning die hard Lost fans had to get up really, really early before work.

And all to discover that, basically, they were all already dead and the island was a either a figment of everybody’s collective imagination, or just Jack’s, depending on which way you want to look at it. 

In the end, though, I’m genuinely disappointed that Gene Hunt didn’t scream on to the beach in his Audi Quattro, snarling “right, you ‘orrible lot, there’s the pub. They even have a saloon bar…”

Wake up, Pam, Bobby’s in the shower…

With two powerful television series coming to an end, I couldn’t help but be disappointed with the lack of imagination that seemed to blight the writers as they prepared to finish their respective shows.  That said, how else could you bring to a close two separate story lines centred around characters who have either been shot in the head or crashed in an aircraft disaster?

The character of Gene Hunt has been left open for another series in which he seems to be contemplating driving a Mercedes 190D, this time looking after a floppy-haired victim who is already complaining about not having his iPhone.  Yawn.  Probably best to leave the format alone now.  At least for the next twenty years.

Lost, on the other hand, has definitely come to the end of its run.  But I think I’d have liked to see them rescued from the island, transported back to Australia and then, on their return home flight, crashing once again…

Fate always gets you in the end.  Even television shows.

The Dark Art Of Motor Insurance…

Yesterday, I received a letter from MoreThan insurance, telling me that the insurance on my Chrysler Grand Voyager is up for renewal and I could get insurance for as little as £206.

To me, this seemed like voodoo magic, mainly because I’m not insured with MoreThan and I only bought the car in February.  So how did they know it was up for renewal, and how did they know exactly what car I owned?

But even more voodoo magic was to come – my renewal from Churchill shows a figure of almost £400 to renew the policy, so MoreThan’s hyperbole junk mail seemed a good price.  It was almost too good to be true.  Indeed, it was too good to be true, because I’ve just gone on to their online system, following the details in the piece of junk mail they sent me, and their quote worked out to be £606!

I’ve often thought that there’s a dark art to motor insurance, and it comprises that old calculating method of looking at the details on the paper, waving a finger in the air and then making up whatever bollocks figure they think they can get away with.

Which is why, after searching through four different ‘comparison’ websites (yes, I’m singing Go Compare! in my head as I write…) using exactly the same details, the price difference is quite staggering.

For a twelve year old Chrysler, with full no claims discount and only limited mileage, with no need to insure it for business purposes as it is simply used as a jalopy and a family bus, the cheapest quote I got was £219.

The most expensive was £1’047.50.  From Asda.  Who are always proud of telling you what great value they offer.

It just goes to show that it pays to shop around.  As does being creative with your occupation, it seems.  Being a Publican, and therefore having the cars kept in a car park, does tend to hurt your premiums a bit.  I’m pleased (ish) with the £360 quote I’ve got from the Post Office, ultimately, which includes full UK + Home breakdown service, European travel and all the other legal paraphernalia that goes with modern day insurance, but if I’d declared myself as a writer rather than a publican, the quote would have been closer to £300.

MoreThan’s policy would have come down from £606 to £490.

The Dark Art of Motor Insurance is, it seems, an odd one.  No longer do we stick with the same insurers year in year out; it just isn’t worth it.  There’s no longer such a thing as customer loyalty, and that’s a shame.

Because I really can’t be arsed to spend hours each year shopping around for a slightly better price.

Adam Boulton v Alastair Campbell…

When it comes to politics, journalists are usually calm, level-headed and, whilst not necessarily unbiased, they’re usually the ones who try to rile the politicians.

Not so in Sky News’s Adam Boulton’s case, who seems to get wound up quite easily by Alastair Campbell.

If you missed their entertaining sparing matches during the current election debacle, check out these videos…

Election Night, early hours of Friday morning…

Monday 10th May 5:44pm …

I managed to catch both of these exchanges live and they’ve provided much entertainment to my election viewing, but the following video was found via Twitter:

As commented against that last video, it’s possibly time Adam Boulton took a bit of a break…!